So the shit’s been hitting the fan for many months now. I mean, I don’t know why I keep belaboring the fact that it’s been a crappy year—Hello, welcome to life and especially, welcome to The Sandwich Generation, right? Sometimes it just takes me some time to accept the muck and try to get over it.

In July, I got a call from my cousin about my youngest aunt. She’s 64 y/o, and earlier this year, she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer– one of the most aggressive and deadliest types of cancers out there. My relatives in Taiwan all seemed rather incredulous bc just a few months prior in October, John and I had been in Taiwan for our annual visit, and my aunt was as energetic and as lively as she’d always been. We did that road trip together up north to Keelung, and it was such a great time despite the pouring rain (and my lame brother).

But after the new year, my aunt went to the hospital for abdominal pain, and that’s when it was revealed that she had a belly full of tumors– too many to count, and being that the cancer had metastasized, she was in Stage 4– the final stages, with a prognosis of living only another 3-6 months.

As the new year progressed, my dad was having more trouble with his eyesight (his two cataract surgeries in November and December didn’t go as planned), my mother was increasingly inconsistent with her cognition, John’s mother was declining, and then in April, Bentley got crazy ass sick. My work, which had been dead the earlier part of the year, suddenly got busy, my listing imploded, and I was feeling stressed way beyond belief.

Now it’s July, and my aunt has made it this far. She endured two rounds of chemo, plus Vitamin C treatments, among other things, but the tumors continue to grow. Three weeks ago, my cousin called and said she was near the end, so my parents (who were in Maryland) and I booked our flights.

I’ve been in Taiwan for almost a week now. My aunt appears much better than I had expected– she is still lively in voice and spirit, And she still goes for walks, but her body is a shadow of its former self. I’m not sure what to say, so we just talk about my parents and the usual family dysfunction. 🙂

My stupid listing continues to be a thorn in my side. In May, the buyer side got pissed about the very late discovery of the home having deed restrictions which prohibited its sale; they asked for money; I had to consult all the veteran agents plus the legal team on retainer at my brokerage… After nearly four months, the buyers finally agreed to cancel the transaction. But the co-listing agent and I are still helping our client navigate this complicated situation. Many calls, emails, and meetings with the housing authority and the city housing department… now we’re heading into August with two options: Sell the home now back to the City at a below-market rate, or wait for an alternative where the City considers selling the home at a higher price to a different housing agency. The latter plan would require that my clients wait another three months for that to get worked out. I’m trying my best to carry this through, but at times, I’m exhausted by the extra effort. Maybe if I didn’t have so many other things going on all at once…

Thankfully, Bentley is doing better. I mean, there have been several blips in the road to recovery, but for the most part, he is stronger and getting back to his old self. We took him on a short road trip in early July to celebrate his progress, my belated bday, and to take a short break, and then as life would have it, he developed that skin infection on his snout PLUS an infection inside his front leg joint. Ugh!!! Another round of vet visits, and he’s now on super strong antibiotics plus he needs to drop some pounds, as he has plumped up 20lbs on the prednisone. SMH.

In positive news, I’m currently in contract. Yeah, one of my clients with whom I had initially met in March, got back on the house hunt in June/July. I was very thankful to have some business brewing again. My clients found a real gem of a home in early July, and we got into contract a week before my flight to Taiwan. I’m so happy to be working with lovely, gracious people. That said, with my Taiwan travel, shepherding the transaction through has required a ton of calls and emails in the middle of the night. I’m hoping we are in the homestretch now, and closing is set for mid August.

My time in Taiwan is going ok. Lots of errands and elder care kind of things like finding activities for my parents, figuring out meals, cleaning, etc. The first three days, I visited with my aunt as well as my three grandparents. I cannot believe those grandparents are still going. It’s mind blowing, honestly. I’ve been shuttling my parents around, so the good news is that I’m becoming more familiar with the lay of the land here. I’ve also had quite a few opportunities to hang out one-on-one with some of my cousins. I’ve gone to the pool a few times too at the condo complex.

But I’m ready to get home. My brother came down from Taipei yesterday, and he’s on some 6-8 day fast to cleanse his gall bladder or whatever, so all he does is stay in his room. My dad still invites him to go walking or to go to the gym, and he always declines. In the middle of the night, he and my father were arguing and yelling again. I mean, I know my mother likes to see him, but really, his visits are so damn lame. He can never eat anything and then he’s so weak and fucked up from the fast, that he never does anything outside his room. What’s the fucking point. Honestly. I’m there prepping meals, finding activities, washing dishes, cutting fruit, cleaning the kitchen, doing laundry, and he sleeps in until noon and does his kooky bullshit. Yesterday, while I was re-heating food in the microwave, he told me microwaving food is really unhealthy and dangerous. I said, I was still going to do it. I mean, is it as unhealthy as having a shitty-ass, ungrateful, money mooching, entitled asshole son??? Fuck off. My ultimate wish with my brother is for him to be out of our lives. I know my parents fucked up with our childhood, but hello, this is real life. Get over it and move on. Nobody owes you anything. If you want to be a weird person living a fringe lifestyle, go ahead but leave us the hell alone. I do not need to be graced by your presence. Don’t do me any fucking favors. I get so annoyed that all these years later, we are still having to deal with his bullshit. If there is any silver lining to my mother’s condition, I hope that she can one day forget about Johnny so the rest of us can fucking live in peace.

Anyway, today is my last day with everybody. I’m going to be driving my dad to run errands and then we’re headed south to my grandparents’ and aunt’s house. After dinner, we’ll drive back to Kaohsuing and tomorrow I fly home. Thank goodness. I gotta get back to home base for realz.