Oh shit, I forgot to tell you that the household had a recent bout with norovirus. Well, I don’t know if that’s a medically accurate statement, but let’s just say, last month, Bubbey had many days of upset tummy and sick poopies. Yes, that’s the technical term. This went on for days and then he flew back East to do his mom’s taxes. I went about my merry way until a day later, I got the runs! I mean, I had multiple delicious meals in a row– and no one at work seemed to suffer any negative impact. But goddammit, I had to cancel an open house and then I was holed up in bed for 2-3 days. At the time, I had Buster over too, and the dogs were like WTF is happening? This person is the lamest, laziest person ever!!! And of course, as my track record would attest, every damn time I felt a little bit better, I would push it too far and fall back into a nauseous mess. This went on for like an entire week. I’m telling you. My dad was calling on the daily trying to get a medical update, like fever stats, stool description, meds, everything. Jesus, dad. I’m gonna just ride it out. I’m not taking fucking notes for you on this.

Eventually, it seems my Achilles heel was my impatience (big surprise). I mean, as soon as I felt any tiny bit of normalcy, I went back to eating shit: dairy, cheese, spicy… yeah, I didn’t follow the BRAT diet. at all. I mean, in my defense, some sites did say the BRAT was too strict, but yes, I agree. Surely, that didn’t mean I should eat a bag of potato chips and down it with ice cream and soda. What can I say, it was many moments of weakness, and I was famished. Desperate times, desperate measures.

Around the same time, when I checked in with Bubs in Maryland, his mom ALSO got nauseous and sick! Was it something about Bubbey and his food prep/handling methods? I don’t want to be accusatory bc after all, he is literally the hand that cooks all my meals and feeds me, but…. I’m just saying. I suppose anecdotally, something did seem to be going around nationwide, no?

I’m just glad that the worst is over. I’ve been food-poisoning free for the last week, and life is good. Now if only I could be well the majority of my days in 2018, that would be freaking fabulous. Is that really so much to fucking ask?

Btw, dealio updates. I’m replacing those wonky JLab bluetooth earbuds with the Apple Airpods. John kept telling me Apple shit doesn’t go on sale and the pricing is all the same everywhere, so I bought them from the Apple store. Then what happens? A few days later, I’m scrolling through my Slickdeals phone app (yes, they have one!) and whadya know? $20 cheaper through Costco. Fucker! I’m telling you, can’t trust anything that boy says, esp when it comes to pricing. Thanks to my credit card extended warranty, I’m going to get reimbursed for the broken earbuds, so I’ll be getting these babies for a discount. I really didn’t think the wired earbuds would bother me much, but turns out, that shit does get tangled A LOT, esp when I’m fumbling with them in the car. And considering how often I am now on the phone, I’m going to give this new technology a try and see if it changes my life.

In other news, now that I am out of the sickness woods, I am turning my attention back to personal care. My skin has been doing great lately. I trimmed back the k-beauty regimen and I’m really trying to get more sleep… so far, so good. That said, I was disappointed to realize I still have a ways to go in terms of being more polished and presentable in public. Turns out, I am guilty of nearly ALL the “mistakes” that make a person look messy. Sure, I have decent self awareness, so I had a hunch it was bad. Just didn’t realize it was like 17/20 bad. Sigh. Work in progress.