Monthly Archives: July 2018

Houseboat 2.0

What can I say, Silicon Valley is a unique place. Yes, my perspective comes mostly from the real estate angle. I mean, where else is a dumpy home built in the 1950s with less than 1,100 sf valued at $2.2 million?!?! Even for someone who lives/works/breathes real estate and who witnesses the regular exchange of this “play money,” I STILL suffer from sticker shock. And shit, if you’re hunkering down in your current scrappy abode trying to make things more comfortable with minor updates here and there? Good fricking luck. ALL the contractors and handypeople are booked solid. We just needed the front arbor/beams replaced, sanded, and painted. Guess how many contractors I had to ask before 1) someone actually bid on the job 2) someone accepted the task. Seven. In the end, only two parties were interested enough to bid and accept. I’m telling you: I’ve been itching to get this done since April. And it won’t be done until mid August. So what does this mean? Contractors are busy as hell (if you’re looking for a job/skill that’s high in demand, consider contractor school!!), and if your project is too small, prepare to wait or prepare to shell out some dough.

The good news is that our beams were replaced last week, and next week we’re getting a new roof. Yup, we’re splurging on a foam roof to replace our old tar and gravel. With global warming and all, we have been burning up in this little houseboat. A few years ago, we got a mini-split A/C system in the bedroom. At the time, we were convinced we swore we ONLY needed it in one room. Boy were we wrong. Every damn day, I’m telling Bubs that I must be undergoing perimenopause. I’m known for running cold ALL THE DAMN TIME. Not anymore. That roof, man (which we signed on the dotted line for back in early April), can not coming fucking fast enough. At this rate, Bubs is practically spending every waking hour in the “cold room” with our Yeti doggie. Fuck, it’s been hot. Thankfully, the evenings cool off considerably.

Other than the home projects, I’m dealing with a doggie diarrhea problem. Yup, twice now in the last month, I have come home to find serious explosions in John’s office. Honestly, I think the new batch of dog food was contaminated or something. I put Bentley on a chicken-rice diet, and still, we’re a week in and the situation remains precarious. I called my girl N for advice. She suggested a med and my vet prescribed it today. I’m hoping for a big change within 24 hours. Man, that stuff is hard to clean, even with the amazing power of OxyClean. It’s a mess, I tell you.

What else. I have been working my ass off. Maybe this is nothing new, but I’ve hit a new level of fatigue. The good news is that I am getting closer… I can feel it. And today, I showed my clients two properties (they’ve seen 28 now) and they like them both. I feel like we’re finally in the sweet spot– in terms of finding properties that are suitable to them AND within striking range. Wish me luck, bc I need to get these people into a home. Seriously, I’ve only been working with them since Memorial Day, but they have been on the hunt for over a year. Yes, please tell me we’re getting close.

I’m also getting better about voicing my advice. I’ve learned so much in the last few months. And at this new office, I am observing a lot of the big dogs… I mean, one lady closed $14m in ONE MONTH. It’s true: you are the company that you keep. Being around top producers pushes you in new ways. Speaking of which, I started making calls again. And guess what, I scored a listing appointment for early August. I met this guy at an open house; he talked with my lender; she guided him to me, and he wants to buy up. That might require him to sell his existing home to purchase the next one. Changes are coming around the corner!

Scared Straight Weekend

Well, I know I’ve been super inconsistent with blogging… It’s a very long story, but a lot has happened over the last several weeks. For one thing, the blog bit me in the ass again. You know me with my radical honesty agenda: my blog is my way of telling it like it is, you know? There’s just so much bullshit out there with social media and curated/manicured/sanitized content, and my blog is like my personal mission to be more honest about things than not. Well, it’s bitten me in the ass before, and it happened again.

Basically, a potential client did some digging on me just as he was signing on to work with me, and well, he had ghosted me twice before and he conveniently read about himself on my blog. I mean, I could have asked him, “How do you know that’s about you?” but it was pretty darn clear. And as J suggested, there’s nothing to say when something like that happens. My name has links to my blog and I mean, such is life. I stand by what I said. Obviously, the story is from my perspective. Maybe he had a great reason for ghosting me both times. Maybe not. Either way, the relationship was unsalvageable, so I just cut bait and moved on.

J and a few close friends of mine all had various discussions about it right after the incident. It REALLY bugged me bc in some weird way, this blog has been some sliver of a pipe dream for me… it’s something I have committed to doing since 2003 and there has always been some small piece of me that wished I were a professional blogger or writer. Who knows if that dream will ever come to fruition in the manner that I consider legit… for now though, the conclusion is that I’m now in a customer-facing role… more so than ever before. It’s probable to assume that clients commit to working with me under an unspoken assumption that what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. And so while I may be free to talk a little bit about how their behavior and actions make me feel, perhaps I cannot be as radically honest with judging how their actions reflect on their character.

The challenge for me in this is that accountability for your actions ties back to my brother… I have personally witnessed how a lifetime of lack of accountability has caused so many problems… but that’s family and this is business. And actually, maybe there’s some irony in it all bc the client discovering my blog and declining to work with me is also a consequence of my own actions, right? The bottom line? People have reasons for behaving the way they do. And even if my blog doesn’t use names, maybe people don’t really want to know how their actions are interpreted by others, namely me. Needless to say, I lost a potential client who had a hefty budget. Sigh. Live and learn.

A few weeks after that incident, I had a relatively uneventful bday. But a few weeks after, we embarked on our Tiny House adventure in Leavenworth, WA. You know, this real estate business is funny. I spend months and months nixing vacations and holidays to put my nose to the grindstone. Of course, the ONE weekend I decide to plan a trip, I meet someone who wants to submit an offer on a property I host open. The timeline went something like this:

Sunday: I held the open house and followed up with this visitor that evening.
Monday: I followed up again bc the offer deadline was Tuesday. No reply.
Wednesday: The first offer deadline passed, and then the buyer decided he was interested in submitting.
Thursday: I worked on the file, reviewed the disclosures, plus discussed his proof of funds, drafted a letter to seller, talked loan options, contingency removal, pricing strategy… We were trying to get the offer in before that weekend of open house when the property would be exposed to another group of buyers, possibly increasing competition.
Friday: I fly to Seattle and all the while, I’m making calls, prepping the offer package, and struggling with spotty cell signal, no wifi reception, and problems with his esign.
Friday afternoon: Offer is submitted and accepted. List agent is super impressed and comments about how hard I worked to make this happen. Everyone is thrilled.
Saturday morning: Buyer changes his mind. I spend the rest of the day trying to figure out if there is a resolution to his issue.
Saturday afternoon: Transaction falls through. No fault of the property.

It might not sound so bad bc the timeline was uber condensed, but basically, I got no sleep and things were super urgent, super important, and super high stress. My three-day vacation got truncated to a 1.5 of enjoyment. Sigh. I was so very disappointed and bummed.

Nonetheless, the tiny home adventure was awesome. I loved the cluster of homes at the campground by the lake, with each house occupied by our friends. We cooked and picnicked around the campfire. It was lovely. J and I were the only child-free couple, and we dubbed this our “scared straight weekend.” Not only was our child-free choice reaffirmed but damnit, I kept bumping my head in my tiny home! You see, prior to this vacation, I was CERTAIN that I could live the tiny house lifestyle. OMG, I was so very wrong. No-siree. Cross that shit off the list. No f-ing way. Our Hanna house, as adorable as it was, that damn thing was like 170 sf. It was way too small. So we got scared straight a second way: no tiny house in our future. For glamping with the pals though? This arrangement was the bomb. And the kiddos had a blast too. I just wish I had taken more pictures. After we got home, the Houseboat felt especially spacious and luxurious. Muhahaha, everyone is happy now!