In preparation for our trip, Bubs started watching a bunch of videos on Seoul. One video we watched had to do with the skyrocketing trend of plastic surgery in Korea. The Koreans are into elective surgery big time (Based on 2014 stats: 1 in 5 women get shit done vs. 1 in 20 women in the US), and the patients are super freaking young. Like under 20 y/o!! I dunno where I stand on all of this.

On one hand, I feel so sad that children THAT young are feeling so badly about their appearances that they are going under the knife. The argument for surgery isn’t purely superficial though. As in China, job applicants have to submit mugshots, so many parents who gift their kids plastic surgeries for their 16th and 18th bdays consider it an “investment” in the child’s career and future. There does seem to be something instinctively “wrong” with having physical appearance and beauty hold so much importance, and yet, if we think about all those studies about how beautiful people get more in life (be it in the form of attention, assistance, promotions, jobs, etc…), is it naive to downplay how influential beauty can be? Even babies respond more positively to beautiful people, so isn’t this just human nature?

My stance with plastic surgery has changed over the years. In my younger years, despite my struggles with acne, I really felt like surgery just promoted superficiality. Anytime my parents complained about my attire or whatever, I reacted angrily, accusing them of being shallow. But now, as a 40-y/o woman, I realize there’s a lot to be said for confidence as a byproduct of attractive appearance. When I was younger, my acne made me closed off. I isolated myself from things I would have done otherwise. And in my mid 30s, when I started investing more time in my attire and my style (after my acne cleared up), I def felt a stronger kick in my step. The connection between appearance and confidence was undeniable. And certainly, if an adult woman opts for a little nip/tuck or facelift or whatever, I’m far less judgey about it now than I used to be. Ultimately, it’s about choice, right? Weigh the pros and cons and then decide for yourself. Honestly, women have been obsessing over beauty since forever, whether it’s in the form of makeup, skin creams/elixirs, faux lashes, botox, fillers, hair removal, tatted brows, hair coloring, pushup bras, etc.

So circling back to plastic surgery for girls… instinctively, it feels wrong but if I consider it from the perspective of confidence, I feel very differently. For example, how different would my experiences as a young woman have been if I had confidence, if I had loved myself? My demons chased me for so long… decades and decades. What if that burden had been removed in my 20s: how might I have flourished? I don’t know what the answer is, and with issues like this, I’m so glad I don’t have kids who rely on me to help direct and navigate them through these complexities.

Anyway, it’ll be interesting to be surrounded by swaths of beautiful people in Seoul. 🙂